Oral Pleasures – South Ken

Posted on by Patrick in Food, Shit London Photo, Signs, South, West | Leave a comment

Bejay's

There is absolutely no way on Earth that this isn’t intentional.

It just can’t be. Can it??

In fact it seems that this kind of innuendo is popular amongst purveyors of ice cream and some of them don’t even have to decency to bother with that, I mean just look at THIS PLACE!

Spotted by Hugo Russell

Ice Cream What Now? Willesden

Posted on by Patrick in Misspelt, Shit London Photo, Signs | 2 Comments

Corn

What happened here? Is this a new frozen treat fad I’ve yet to hear of or is it possible that someone is unfamiliar with the concept of an ice cream cone? Maybe this could just the result of whoever wrote the sign being given their instructions in a Lancashire accent?

Answers on a postcard please….

Spotted by Andy Clough

Route to Hell, Southwark

Posted on by Patrick in Shit London Photo, Signs, South, Transport | 2 Comments

666bus

Perhaps naively I always regarded the N29 as the bus to hell. This was based on nothing more than witnessing a succession of fights on there, seeing not one but two people manage to alight from the bus only to then fall under it wheels and get run over but mostly the clientele which often times resembled characters from a deleted scene from Jim Henson’s, The Dark Crystal.

It seems I was wrong though and that London has had its own dedicated bus service to the subterranean kingdom of Lucifer running for a while now. This must be down to Boris.

Spotted by Brendan Guyatt

Poor Jem, Teddington

Posted on by Patrick in Bleak, Graffiti, Puns, Shit London Photo, South | 1 Comment

jem'll

There would have been an evening a few years ago when Jem was dreaming of setting up his “one stop shop for all your household needs” and perhaps he or a friend came up with this cast iron and pleasingly relevant pun name to call the business. A warm, wholesome name that conjured images of dreams coming true, of benign elderly men in shiny, flammable clothing and armchairs installed with mechanised badge delivery systems. Fast forward a few years and the name he once so adored has become a horrible reminder of a real life bogey man, his myriad of deviant crimes and the shattered dreams of thousands of children. Jem finds himself constantly taunted by people in the street saying “Are you going to change your name?” or perhaps giving him sideways glances and wondering if merely through association with the pun he may perhaps be a dreaded nonce. The words “Local Friendly Service” take on a new sinister edge. Poor Jem finally is driven to graffiti his own van just to stop the sniggers, the dumb questions and the whispers behind his back. His once perfect dream now lays in tatters around his feet, a solid pun now a millstone around his neck. I bet even watching those scouts trying to eat their packed lunch on a rollercoaster can’t raise a smile from his these days.

Spotted by Matt Aldhouse

Stay Safe, Soho

Posted on by Patrick in Bleak, Local Government, Shit London Photo, West End | Leave a comment

saferneighbourhood

Sometimes I feel sorry for the Met. If they stand back and “observe” as people are burnt out of their homes and every precious branch of JD Sports in South London is looted to oblivion then people get pissed off at them. If they gather in their hundreds in full riot gear to eject a few protestors from an old police station in Soho, people get pissed off at them for that. If during some light hearted kettling they violently shove a half cut, middle aged man with his hands in his pockets onto his face who then subsequently has a heart attack and dies, the public gets all uppity about the fact they tried to blame their way out of it. Worse still, when an officer innocently tries to earn a little more cash then the pittance they are on by selling confidential information to the press they are widely condemned for it. They just can’t win can they? Which I why I feel especially sorry for them when I see sights like this that suggest that they can’t even make a window safe let alone an entire neighbourhood.

Spotted by John Marshall

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ... 120 121   Next »