Pubs

Incentive, Camden

Posted on by Patrick in Nightlife, North, Pubs, Shit London Photo, Signs | Leave a comment

Incentive, Camden

We don’t have a culture of tipping in London bars. It’s just not the done thing. Not because we are a tight fisted people more because drinks are already ludicrously expensive in most places and because, unlike other countries, being a barman isn’t seen as a legitimate vocation here, more of a stop gap on the way to something else. This is shame as other countries can do it so well. In the U.S  the barman takes your drinking very seriously as you tip him after each drink. He’ll make sure your drink is refreshed before you even ask him to, he’ll give you some bar snacks and after you’ve had a few drinks he’ll give you a couple of free ones. There are no such things as measures either.

Here every single last drop of booze is strictly measured to make sure that you don’t have accidentally enjoy even one tiny drop, one wayward bit of booze vapour more than you’ve paid for. Bar staff will sell you a drink only to bark  less than 20 seconds later “Ladies and gentleman can you finish up your drinks PUH-leese” and threaten to take it off you unless they see you gulping it down in the manner of someone who has just emerged from a terrifying, thirsty ordeal in the Sahara desert.

Maybe if drink prices were lowered just a smidgen and bar staff  became a little more attentive then we could start a culture of tipping here. It’d take a while to get used to at first but as the smoking ban proved seasoned drinkers are a versatile bunch who can adapt to change easily. Incentives like the one displayed above could only help things along.

Spotted by Tom Cullen

Encouragement, Peckham Rye

Posted on by Patrick in Pubs, Shit London Photo, South, Toilets | Leave a comment

Encouragement, Peckham Rye

Reading this aloud sounds like the strangest cheerleader chant ever. It’s catchy and direct. In fact, this has become my earworm for the day, so much so that I’m going to have to make a visit downstairs myself now.

Spotted by Paul Osman

Car Park, New Malden

Posted on by Patrick in Pubs, Shit London Photo, Signs, South | Leave a comment

Car Park, New Malden

A car park for pubes? What kind of people are going to this pub anyway, 70′s porn stars? This pub really needs a new sign writer.

Spotted by Luke Bellord

Pub Notice, Newington Green

Posted on by Patrick in East, Pubs, Shit London Photo | 2 Comments

Pub Notice, Newington Green

For residents of Newington Green with children this probably proves difficult. You could be sitting comfortably in your front room watching Miranda or something when the clock strikes nine and you’re are suddenly flouting the arbitrary rules set by a pub down the road. What do you do with your kids? Hide them in a priest hole? Set them up in a hidden apartment like the Franks? How do they enforce this anyway? Does this pub send out a patrol at nine pm armed with pitchforks and flaming torches looking for any stray kids that might still be out after the watershed? What do they do with any kids that they catch?

Who knows? Stay vigilant.

Spotted by Tom Uprichard

Air Vent, St Martins Lane

Posted on by Patrick in Graffiti, Pubs, Shit London Photo, West End | Leave a comment

Air Vent, St Martins Lane

Shit Londoner Steve Rees sent me this excellent photo saying….

“I still giggle when remembering this dryly witty bit of almost existential scrawl in biro on a fan cover in the male cubicle of the gents bogs in the garish gin palace that is The Duke Of Salisbury in St. Martin’s Lane.

It’s high up so the scrawler must have been tall.”

Manrose Manfeel almost sounds like it could be the name of a lost Dickens character.